Hey guys!
Here's an post from a young girl named Aisling. It's her 'realisation'/'coming out' story.
Enjoy!
The first time I even thought about not being straight was about a year ago when I had a sex dream about my best friend. I actually really enjoyed the dream and when I wanted to have the dream again I started becoming confused about my sexuality. For many months I did not know whether I was straight, bisexual or gay. I kept trying to make myself believe I was straight but then I finally began to realise that I did like girls and I couldn't do anything about it. So then I was full sure I was bisexual , I told my close friends who all were very kind and accepting of it. One of my friends even thought i was gay anyway. I came out to my mother but that was awful because she kept saying I don't know what I'm talking about and I'm too young to know and I shouldn't be thinking about things like that. However the average age for realising you're LGBT is 12 and the average age for coming out is 19. Anyway I then got into another problem and I thought it was bad to be bi rather than gay or straight, however my friends, both of whom are straight, told me that its not bad that I've more choice and I've best of both worlds. I went away happy and proud to be who I am. However, in the end I realised that I'm gay. I'm a lesbian. I just realised that I want girls, that I like girls and that I can't change that and that it's nothing to be ashamed of. Its normal and I now understand that there's no point in being with a guy just because it's easier to get a boyfriend when I really desire a girlfriend. So for me at the moment I'm sitting patiently hoping for some girl to come find me, to be with me .
I've also come out to more of my friends who're all grand with it. One of my friends is really homophobic though so I didn't tell her. We're not really close but we still talk often and she really hates gay people so that's why I didn't come out to her. For me so far, its been a rollercoaster but I've now found myself.
So my advice to any LGBT people is to be yourself and be happy because its your life and you've a right to live it the way you want. However I would be cautious who you tell, if you're going to come out publicly remember first that you may be forced to take slagging from homophobic people, so just look after yourself.
Thanks for listening.
Aisling
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
A Galway 'Coming Out' Story.....
Hiyas,
I was sent this from a young bisexual guy in Galway. It describes his coming to terms with his sexuality and his 'coming out' story. Hope you enjoy :)
I was raised in a middle class family and I had to find many things out on my own. My parents never gave me 'the talk' so I never knew what sex and all that stuff was until the normal 6th class lessons on it. So like most things, I had to figure out about sexual orientation myself.
Growing up in an all boys secondary school in Galway, the term 'gay' was often used as another word for 'stupid' or 'weird'. It was used way out of context. I never really knew what the word meant. I knew it had to do something with liking boys but I never really grasped the culture and I had never really met a gay or bisexual person before so I had never really experienced the presence of a homosexual but I was always an open minded child so I ignored how bad people made it out to be and I decided that when the day came, I would make my judgement.
I was occasionally called a girl and gay while growing up just because I was honest to myself and I stuck with my female friends whom I had more in common with instead of kidding myself and pretending I was a 'jock' or whatever they called themselves. I always took it to heart whenever people said stuff like that. I grew up a sensitive child who always felt like they were second best because of sibling rivalry with my brother for my parent's attention. I grew to hate my parents and my whole life for that matter. I don't know how many nights I stayed up in my room just crying and wishing I could just run away and find people who would understand me for I was only beginning to understand myself.
I never even suspected I was anything but straight until I came upon forums like BeLonGTo on the net. I didn't set out to search the Internet for a LGBT forum or support group. I just came upon it and it intrigued me. This was my chance to meet new people and get to the bottom of what being gay is! However, I knew something wasn't so heterosexual about me when I was getting aroused over the male body. I still denied that anything was up but deep down I knew. I tried to blame it on just being a phase but after months of it not going away, I knew that these were my true feelings.
In a matter of months, I worked myself from straight to bicurious and then to bisexual. And I knew that I had to just be true to myself and live my life and not one in which I pretended to be something I wasn't. Even if people wouldn't necessarily favor my sexual preference if they ever came to find out, I would still be true to myself and when figuring out your identity, that is one of the most important things to keep in mind.
The first person I came out to was somebody I had met on the LGBT forums that I had since been posting on for almost a year off and on(I know, but I live on the net :P). He was alright with it but why wouldn't he be if he was bisexual as well? Since then I have come out to almost all of my online friends as well as a few friends in real life. For some reason I feel better telling people who are not my best friends because I guess there is not that possibility for a wrecked friendship because they could possibly be disappointed in me. Believe it or not, I would rather have some 'rumor' reach their ears about my sexuality rather than me have to tell them myself.
Since admitting my sexuality to myself, I have felt more free and for once in my live I am happy. You have to take life as it comes at you and remain true to yourself. Don't be afraid to go against tradition if it is what you truly feel inside.
I was sent this from a young bisexual guy in Galway. It describes his coming to terms with his sexuality and his 'coming out' story. Hope you enjoy :)
I was raised in a middle class family and I had to find many things out on my own. My parents never gave me 'the talk' so I never knew what sex and all that stuff was until the normal 6th class lessons on it. So like most things, I had to figure out about sexual orientation myself.
Growing up in an all boys secondary school in Galway, the term 'gay' was often used as another word for 'stupid' or 'weird'. It was used way out of context. I never really knew what the word meant. I knew it had to do something with liking boys but I never really grasped the culture and I had never really met a gay or bisexual person before so I had never really experienced the presence of a homosexual but I was always an open minded child so I ignored how bad people made it out to be and I decided that when the day came, I would make my judgement.
I was occasionally called a girl and gay while growing up just because I was honest to myself and I stuck with my female friends whom I had more in common with instead of kidding myself and pretending I was a 'jock' or whatever they called themselves. I always took it to heart whenever people said stuff like that. I grew up a sensitive child who always felt like they were second best because of sibling rivalry with my brother for my parent's attention. I grew to hate my parents and my whole life for that matter. I don't know how many nights I stayed up in my room just crying and wishing I could just run away and find people who would understand me for I was only beginning to understand myself.
I never even suspected I was anything but straight until I came upon forums like BeLonGTo on the net. I didn't set out to search the Internet for a LGBT forum or support group. I just came upon it and it intrigued me. This was my chance to meet new people and get to the bottom of what being gay is! However, I knew something wasn't so heterosexual about me when I was getting aroused over the male body. I still denied that anything was up but deep down I knew. I tried to blame it on just being a phase but after months of it not going away, I knew that these were my true feelings.
In a matter of months, I worked myself from straight to bicurious and then to bisexual. And I knew that I had to just be true to myself and live my life and not one in which I pretended to be something I wasn't. Even if people wouldn't necessarily favor my sexual preference if they ever came to find out, I would still be true to myself and when figuring out your identity, that is one of the most important things to keep in mind.
The first person I came out to was somebody I had met on the LGBT forums that I had since been posting on for almost a year off and on(I know, but I live on the net :P). He was alright with it but why wouldn't he be if he was bisexual as well? Since then I have come out to almost all of my online friends as well as a few friends in real life. For some reason I feel better telling people who are not my best friends because I guess there is not that possibility for a wrecked friendship because they could possibly be disappointed in me. Believe it or not, I would rather have some 'rumor' reach their ears about my sexuality rather than me have to tell them myself.
Since admitting my sexuality to myself, I have felt more free and for once in my live I am happy. You have to take life as it comes at you and remain true to yourself. Don't be afraid to go against tradition if it is what you truly feel inside.
Luke, 20, Galway
Sunday, May 2, 2010
'Growing Up Gay'
So,
The two part documentary series 'Growing Up Gay' concluded last Monday to a very receptive audience gay and straight alike.
The series, filmed over 18 months, followed gay young people in Ireland, the difficulties they face and how they confronted the coming out process.
Part 1 which aired on Monday the 19th of April on RTÉ2 followed Riyadh, Zoe, Patrick and Natasha as each dealt with their own individual turmoil along with their sexual awakening.
It was an excellent portrayal of the LGBT issues that gays in Ireland face even today, but never forgetting that these are only young teenagers barely of legal age. One by one we were introduced to each of them, each with their own problems, but none deterred from being a teenager that any parent would be proud to have.
However, the most interesting insight given by the program was that of the parents.
We saw the fear in Zoe's father when he found out that his daughter tried to hurt herself, but the love he had in his voice when he talked about his daughter.
We saw Patrick's father talk proudly about his son. "I'm proud of him" were the words he spoke defiantly and we the audience knew that he meant it with every fibre of his being.
One of the more heart-wrenching moments of the program was that of Sam, Riyadh's father. His overwhelming love for his son overcame his own misgivings and conservative Arab background. He says that at first he was angry “Why me? Why him? Why does it have to be that way?”, but that he trusts the gay community to stand by his son if he was ever to “be in trouble one day”.
This one scene was probably one of the more remarkable of the series as it gave any young gay person watching hope that no matter how conservative or disagreeing a parent is, it will turn out ok in the end.
One of the parts of the show that I felt was done very well was the showing of Zoe getting her hair cut “to look more gay” and Riyadh's date in Panti bar. These things were shown as not "gay" things to do, but typical teenager behaviour. Many teenagers go through a phase of 'odd' hairstyles and EVERY teenager goes through the stage of 'the first date'. The creators of the show therefore carried out the biggest feat of normalizing a person's sexuality, and as a result created a documentary that relates to everyone.
Part 2 of the documentary also showed the organisation of the 'Gay Prom' 2008! It gave us an insight of how the debs for young gay people in Ireland is often a horrible and lonely experience. 'Gay Prom' was a chance for those young people to have a second chance at their debs by being able to bring whomever they wanted. Hosted by Panti and Brendan Courtney, the event held at the Mansion House was a roaring success!
[Also, on another note, Gay Prom 2010 has been confirmed and will be held in around October time, but that's for another post.....YEY!!!]
The success of this documentary has been huge! I have already heard the words 'brilliant' and 'acclaimed' being thrown about several different circles. Growing up Gay not only provided us with an insight of how young people are dealing with their sexual awakening but also how Irish society has failed them. research commissioned by youth group BeLonGTo has discovered that the average age for young gay people to come out is nineteen, despite the average age of self-awareness being set at twelve. In the intervening years, a quarter of respondents had resorted to self-harm as a way of dealing with victimization and bullying, while a fifth had contemplated or attempted suicide.
For any LGBT person who has "come out", 'Growing up Gay' is almost painfully resonant. And hopefully will have opened many parent's eyes to the difficulties their gay children face in their lives. And hopefully they will give the empathy that their children need at this VITAL point in their lives.
Congratulations Kelleher and Rodgers and Across the Line productions on creating a beautiful documentary and giving the Irish public a glimpse of what actually lies behind the closet.
P.S. You can still watch 'Growing Up Gay' here Enjoy :D
Love!x
The two part documentary series 'Growing Up Gay' concluded last Monday to a very receptive audience gay and straight alike.
The series, filmed over 18 months, followed gay young people in Ireland, the difficulties they face and how they confronted the coming out process.
Part 1 which aired on Monday the 19th of April on RTÉ2 followed Riyadh, Zoe, Patrick and Natasha as each dealt with their own individual turmoil along with their sexual awakening.
It was an excellent portrayal of the LGBT issues that gays in Ireland face even today, but never forgetting that these are only young teenagers barely of legal age. One by one we were introduced to each of them, each with their own problems, but none deterred from being a teenager that any parent would be proud to have.
However, the most interesting insight given by the program was that of the parents.
We saw the fear in Zoe's father when he found out that his daughter tried to hurt herself, but the love he had in his voice when he talked about his daughter.
We saw Patrick's father talk proudly about his son. "I'm proud of him" were the words he spoke defiantly and we the audience knew that he meant it with every fibre of his being.
One of the more heart-wrenching moments of the program was that of Sam, Riyadh's father. His overwhelming love for his son overcame his own misgivings and conservative Arab background. He says that at first he was angry “Why me? Why him? Why does it have to be that way?”, but that he trusts the gay community to stand by his son if he was ever to “be in trouble one day”.
This one scene was probably one of the more remarkable of the series as it gave any young gay person watching hope that no matter how conservative or disagreeing a parent is, it will turn out ok in the end.
One of the parts of the show that I felt was done very well was the showing of Zoe getting her hair cut “to look more gay” and Riyadh's date in Panti bar. These things were shown as not "gay" things to do, but typical teenager behaviour. Many teenagers go through a phase of 'odd' hairstyles and EVERY teenager goes through the stage of 'the first date'. The creators of the show therefore carried out the biggest feat of normalizing a person's sexuality, and as a result created a documentary that relates to everyone.
Part 2 of the documentary also showed the organisation of the 'Gay Prom' 2008! It gave us an insight of how the debs for young gay people in Ireland is often a horrible and lonely experience. 'Gay Prom' was a chance for those young people to have a second chance at their debs by being able to bring whomever they wanted. Hosted by Panti and Brendan Courtney, the event held at the Mansion House was a roaring success!
[Also, on another note, Gay Prom 2010 has been confirmed and will be held in around October time, but that's for another post.....YEY!!!]
The success of this documentary has been huge! I have already heard the words 'brilliant' and 'acclaimed' being thrown about several different circles. Growing up Gay not only provided us with an insight of how young people are dealing with their sexual awakening but also how Irish society has failed them. research commissioned by youth group BeLonGTo has discovered that the average age for young gay people to come out is nineteen, despite the average age of self-awareness being set at twelve. In the intervening years, a quarter of respondents had resorted to self-harm as a way of dealing with victimization and bullying, while a fifth had contemplated or attempted suicide.
For any LGBT person who has "come out", 'Growing up Gay' is almost painfully resonant. And hopefully will have opened many parent's eyes to the difficulties their gay children face in their lives. And hopefully they will give the empathy that their children need at this VITAL point in their lives.
Congratulations Kelleher and Rodgers and Across the Line productions on creating a beautiful documentary and giving the Irish public a glimpse of what actually lies behind the closet.
P.S. You can still watch 'Growing Up Gay' here Enjoy :D
Love!x
The G Scene....
Hiya!
Welcome to my new blog for the Gay Scene('The G Scene' get it??) in Ireland.
In this blog I hope to discuss all the relevant LGBT new as it comes in!
From the Panti's new look, to the latest donkey poo to come from 'his holiness', to the gay prom! :D
Hopefully I'll get some other contributors to the blog in the future, but for now.......
Welcome to 'The G Scene'! :)
Love!x
Welcome to my new blog for the Gay Scene('The G Scene' get it??) in Ireland.
In this blog I hope to discuss all the relevant LGBT new as it comes in!
From the Panti's new look, to the latest donkey poo to come from 'his holiness', to the gay prom! :D
Hopefully I'll get some other contributors to the blog in the future, but for now.......
Welcome to 'The G Scene'! :)
Love!x
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